Wednesday, January 30, 2013

friendships

Verse 1.45: Better for me if the sons of Dhṛtarāṣṭra, weapons in hand, were to kill me unarmed and unresisting on the battlefield.

Sometimes when things are tough, we too say things like this. Things that we don't necessarily stand for but in the moment, we truly and genuinely believe in what we are saying. It symbolizes that we've reached the end of our tether and are crying out in need.

These times of crises are actually the times we need help the most. Sharing one's thoughts in confidence is essential to the bhakti practitioner. Just like Arjuna is doing now, we too should seek shelter in those who are more advanced and learned. That is why close friendships are encouraged within the practice of bhakti.

The difference between spiritual friendships and those in the material world is the focus upon which the relationship is based on. Bhakti-centered friendships are based on helping one another come closer to God, which naturally brings individuals closer together as well. It's an amazing phenomenon. Sometimes people become afraid when they hear that someone wants to become more God-conscious. They think, "If my husband/wife/friend/son/daughter becomes more God-conscious, then they will have no time for me!" Interestingly, one who becomes more Krsna conscious actually becomes more conscious in all spheres of their personality.

Material friendships, no matter how deep or sweet they may be are still prone to the "what's in it for me" mentality. Just ask anyone who has been friends with someone over a span of a few years. Both persons will say that there have been ups and downs in the relationship just because sometimes one person's needs have taken over the relationship. When the focus isn't on something outside of the individuals and when there isn't a common goal, then inevitably the focus tends to turn to oneself. It's not anyone's fault, it's just the nature of the material world.

The ways of the material world can easily get one down and that's why having those friends you can rely on in is so important. They help you get you out of your mental head space. I know that I have my handful of friends that I can always turn to when I'm starting to "mental out" (i.e. get wrapped up in my head). They'll commiserate with me for awhile and then bring me back to a Krsna-centric reality. They won't allow me to wallow and for that I am grateful.

So to all of my old friends and new friends out there - Thank you! Thank you for encouraging me and keeping me sane in my practice of bhakti.

3 comments:

  1. Loved this post. Encouraging association, helping us to keep focus amidst our trials on what matters most, can be one of the greatest blessings we can have. I'm glad to have a few really good friends that, though not spiritual, are always there for me when I need them.

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  2. The strongest friendships and relationships happen, I believe, when we are God-centered first. They are, by their nature, unselfish and loving, having the best interest of the other at heart.
    Beautiful reflection, Vrndavana!

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  3. Thank you both so much! It's hard to find God-centered relationships, so when we do - hang on tight!

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